LAUGHING GNOME

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Song Title
LAUGHING GNOME
Writers
Bowie
Publisher
Essex Music Benelux B.V.
% Publisher Controls
100%
Territory Controlled
Holland
Themes/Keywords
Children's Song, Laughter, Magic, Silly, Walking
Lyrics
I was walking down the high street when I heard footsteps behind me,
And there was a little old man in scarlet and grey chuckling away.
Well, he trotted back to my house and he sat beside the telly
With his tiny hands on his tummy chuckling away, laughing all day.

(Spoken) “I ought to report you to the Gnome office.” “Gnome office, ha ha ha!”

CHORUS
“Ha ha ha! He he he! I’m a laughing gnome and you can’t catch me.
Ha ha ha! He he he! I’m a laughing gnome and you can’t catch me.”
Said the laughing gnome.

Well, I gave him roasted toadstools and a glass of dandelion wine.
Then I put him on a train to Eastbourne and carried his bag and gave him a fag.

(Spoken) “’Ave you got a light, boy?” “’ere! Where do you come from?”
“Gnomeman’s Land.” “Oh, really.”

In the morning when I woke up, he was sitting on the edge of my bed,
With his brother whose name was Fred. He’d brought him along to sing me a song.

(Spoken) “Ere! What’s that clicking sound?” “That’s Fred. He’s a metrognome.”

CHORUS
“Ha ha ha! He he he! I’m a laughing gnome and you can’t catch me.
Ha ha ha! He he he! I’m a laughing gnome and you can’t catch me.”

(Spoken) “Own up. I’m a gnome, ain’t I?” “Ain’t you got a gnome to go to?”
“No! We’re gnomads.” “Didn’t they teach you to get your ‘air cut at school? You look like a
rolling gnome.” “Not at the London School of Ecognomics.”

Now they’re staying up the chimney and we’re living on caviar and honey
And they’re making me lots of money, writing comedy prose for radio shows.

(Spoken) “It’s the er - it’s the Gnome service, of course.” “One more time!”

Repeat CHORUS and fade.

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